Your Hemingway is not my Foster Wallace

Your Hemingway is not my Foster Wallace



you are thinking about survival
calculating it on your fingers and toes
the birth of your knowing
you are a figure in my stories
they listen with open ears
I tell them of the story of your slaughter
the mind knows what it is doing
a body can be a dumb beast
that flows along blindly
but the mind knows
all the bodies in the world
they don't know
they are respectfully hypnotized
the mind is a patrician
and the body is a plebian
the rightful ruler has been banished
the mind has been dethroned
an evil scondrel of a soul
sits upon a false throne
spilling out a putrid bile
poisoning everything it touches
robbing the body of its dignity
everything is illuminated by the soul
an erie yellowish light
that sickens the mind and imagination
this light from the soul is artificial
we bask in its aborted glow
we indulge ourselves in the soul's sickness
even when it hurts so much
more than we can control
wanting everyone to notice
our love with the sickness
we pour it all over us
wallow in the ugliness
we are children of the mire
apocalyptic children
waiting for the end
waiting for the bomb
to end our desire
to end our suffering
bring it on now
we are ready
I taste your candy
It keeps me coming back for more
I am addicted
Sawing off the fingers with a hacksaw
They come off so easily
This little piggy …
Embracing you
Preventing you from giving
To take
And scream
As you watch me cut
I touch you with her severed finger
A well-off 20 something
All bright and sunny bottoms
This is the best sex she ever had
Dreaming of my penis
Allowing her to see through parallel eyes
She is horrified
You are horrified
Good sex is always about the approach
How you proceed from one thing to the other
Both asking me why
Grunting as I thrust myself inside her
I am covered with her blood
Shit, blood, and semen
Showing her the horse’s mouth
Sipping Bourbon
I stick three of her fingers inside you
And both of her thumbs up your anus
Noisily subversive
Dipping them into my favorite sections
Dazzled by the strangeness
A gargoyle’s grin upon my lips
The scrappy ordeal
It never lets up
Until she is dead
Getting on with the job
She stops making noise when I pound a stake through her skull
Life is so weird when you take it
It is best this way
Now they cannot touch her
Those people who always get into trouble
Rubbing her blood all over you
Gorgeously sordid and transformative
A dead fish soup
Poured into bowl-sized portions of the world
This evil little world
This dark little room
Where I sacrifice the world for you
Looking for a sympathetic face
The powerful voices
The sheen of worship not so glaring
You whimper
And cry
As you taste her on your lips
Our lives are beginning
to run parallel to each other
Saying what I think and feel
I feel you
You are so soft
I cut you
You bleed for me
Parallel lives
Is that even possible?
Could you be me?
Can there be another?
This power overwhelms me
It consumes me
Exuding out of my pores
My pheromones have been corrupted with life
Exposing the stupidity
I didn’t really give a damn
One way or the other
No remorse
No fear
No reason to stop now
Everything was working fine
It seemed like things were working together
Killing them little by little
Just a small dose
Untraceable amounts
The poison builds up over time
No one was the wiser
A nightmare producing more and more insane asylums
And prisons
They pop up everywhere after a toxic rain
The greatest misery
In the midst of the jamboree
Your blood on my hands
And a shit-eating grin on my face
I should have wiped that look off of my face
I traded a piece of your mind for a water-bong
Smoked the shit that I grew in my backyard
A special blend
A frenzied blend
It controls my mind
Calms me down
For this manic episode
Seeing them through the eyes of vengeance
I didn’t care anymore
This was not about them
It was about us
The love between two lost individuals
I would have said souls, but I don’t believe in a soul
The soul is a social creation
The rich and powerful made your soul
The purpose of your soul is to keep you down
To pacify you
Make you wait for your reward in heaven
And not here on earth
My rewards are here and now
Live for now
Don’t put off anything for tomorrow